How do I help my foster child with their depression/sadness?

Foster children may face increased challenges related to mental health and well-being, such as depression, as well as be faced with bouts of sadness and low mood. They are likely to have experienced traumatic events during their childhood, like abandonment, neglect and abuse.

The following signs may be an indication that your foster child is experiencing challenges with their mental health:

• Persistent irritable or bad-tempered behaviour
• Low opinion of themselves, which could manifest as low or negative self-talk
• Loss of interest in things they used to enjoy
• Low energy levels or fatigue
• Changes in appetite
• Withdrawal from social interactions and occasions, even with family
• Disrupted sleep or trouble falling asleep

That said, more serious signs include the following:

• Self-harm
• Substance abuse or dependency
• Thoughts about suicide or self-harm
• Giving away possessions

If you notice these signs in your foster child, you must help them through. Here’s how you can support them during this challenging time:

Have an open conversation

Create a space for your foster child, where they feel safe and secure opening up to you. This could be in their bedroom or another space where they feel comfortable, in or outside your home. Additionally, low-stress environments, such as walking in nature, can help your foster child to relax and express themselves.

When having the conversation, listen to what they have to say and ask questions. Reassure them that you will listen without judgement, and no matter what they tell you, you will not be upset.

Encourage a healthy lifestyle

Healthy habits that make up a healthy lifestyle will complement other strategies you are using to help your foster child with their depression. Frequent exercise has been shown to improve mental well-being and raise confidence and self-esteem.

Moreover, encouraging your foster child to take up hobbies and activities that have a social element to them can help alleviate feelings and symptoms associated with depression.

Seek professional help

Contacting a professional like your local GP can help you support your foster child. They might recommend you seek therapy for your foster child and may even prescribe appropriate medication to help alleviate the symptoms.

If you have trouble getting in touch with your GP, you can also contact the NHS through their online helpline or call them on 111 for guidance. You’ll get expert advice from a healthcare professional on managing depression after they’ve had a conversation with you and listened to your concerns. From there, they may wish to speak to the foster child themselves or encourage you to see a specialist so your foster child gets the right help.

However, it doesn’t have to be a healthcare professional who can help you and your foster child. There are plenty of other resources available where you can seek help and support:

• Call Samaritans on 116 123 or visit samaritans.org
• Text SHOUT to 85258 or visit giveusashout.org
• Call C.A.L.L. on 0800 132 737 or visit callhelpline.org.uk (Wales only)

You can also seek professional help privately and online. With modern technology, your foster child can talk to a therapist without leaving the comfort of your home. Online support services like BetterHelp and Kooth offer support and counselling; however, you might need to check the age restrictions.